Fear

I am a big, fat scaredy cat.
I always have been.
Fear has been my closest confidant for way too many years.

When I was young, I was afraid of the wind...
and the thunder...
and cats and dogs and rabbits and chickens...
and the dark...
and being alone...
and going places...
and of gas pumps...
and the drive through...
and the telephone...

You get the hint. I was scared of everything.
And I knew it.
And I hated it.

(but somehow I was never afraid to be in front of people
nor to stand up for what I believed in. hmmm...odd...)

Anyway,
one day I woke up and decided that enough was enough.
I was not going to be afraid.
I was tired of living my life in fear.

The End.

And, suddenly I pushed myself past my own limits
and I learned that I liked animals
and the weather
and being alone in the dark
and I discovered that none of that was scary at all.

BUT

now I'm an adult.
And I'm still a big, fat scaredy cat.

I'm afraid of flying...
and hoping...
and telephones (still)...
and failure...
and the unknown...

And I know it.
And I hate it.
And I KNOW it's held me back from so many great experiences
that I have.

So, I've been praying to build the courage
to face my fears and learn how to deal with them
when a good friend of mine said,

"Fears are selfish;
they are your way of justifying yourself from having to do."

(Thanks, Kristy.)

And it made sense!

I was finding a way around whatever I had to do
because it is easier to say
"I'm scared"
than it is to push myself through the agony of facing my fears
and just doing it.

So, my new goal is this:

When a GOOD opportunity comes along,
and it pushes me beyond my limits,
I will repeat the following-

"Don't think. Don't fear. Just do."

Will you?